Exhausted, sleep cycle all out of whack; and a bit of venting …..

Some here may remember that I have Lupus …. Well, the wonderful two year remission that I’ve been enjoying, I think is about to end ….. I’ve tried soooo hard to watch and avoid my triggers, but sometimes things are just so beyond our control 

Those winter cold germs managed to find me just after Christmas … I was house bound for about five days … and if DH hadn’t helped me by taking me to the Grocery before the stores closed New Years Eve, we would have been eating frozen pizza … and then I fevered all of January 1, and when the fever broke I was like a soggy noodle, absolutely limp …. slowly each day I started to feel stronger, though for some reason this time it seemed to take longer to feel better

Last Friday the 11th I took my Mom for her annual mammogram, bone density and x-rays (she’s a four year breast cancer survivor) and the new Medical Arts building uses those lovely new compact fluorescent bulbs … they were recessed in the ceiling but they were not shielded … Lupus sufferers are not the only ones that are fluorescent light sensitive, many with autoimmune diseases have a very hard time with unshielded fluorescent light … that’s why they need to be shielded behind a screen ….. well, about five minutes in the dressing room with Mom, and I can feel my skin start to crawl and boy oh boy was I getting short tempered …. I finally looked up and seen the new lights, not just a few lights but several spaced about two feet apart!  ….. I had to leave Mom and leave the building!  …. Needless to say, the Hospital board, my Rheumatologist, the Ontario Lupus Assoc., and Lupus Canada will be hearing from me ….. it is unconceivable for a medical building to have lighting that can be detrimental to the people exposed  … and then the migraine started 

My Mom is Ukrainian decent, and Ukrainian New Years was on Monday, however the Ukrainian community held a New Years Eve dinner and dance on Saturday … so having missed out on New Years, John and I decided to go … my migraine was manageable if I avoided alcohol … the dinner was lovely and I found the stamina for a polka or two     ………. We left just after the midnight cheers …. My sister and mother left shortly after …. I’d just gotten my jammies on when the phone rings, my sister all hysterical as Mom had fallen from the steps up to front door, she’d called 911, Mom was unconscious ….. well, winter coat and boots on, grab cell phone, keys, and purse and out the door …. I arrived about five minutes before the ambulance ….. lovely gash on Mom’s head, but she was awake and coherent …. Thank God it was only three stitches, and the bruises and whiplash to her muscles … no broken bones …. And around 7:30 am Mom was released to come home … I took the first shift watching Mom … and by the time I could go home to my own bed, it was well into the evening on Sunday  

It’s now Wednesday …. And my body clock is still out of whack …the migraine is on again, off again, on again … and I’m exhausted … I’m also very afraid of my Lupus flaring …. I put a call in to my Rheumatologist but he’s on a well deserved vacation … I could see an associate but I’m not yet really flaring  … knowing my body, I just feel that something is brewing  …. Gosh, I hate this disease and I don’t want to go back on the medications, they’re pretty nasty and each relapse it seems I’m on bigger guns than the last time around …. Sigh

Well, if you all have gotten this far, thank you for reading my vent …. I’m not sure what the purpose of all this is, except it does feel good to put in writing what I’m feeling …

I do have much to be thankful for …. Mom’s okay, sore but she will heal … my sister’s living at home right now, so she can look after Mom and I can be her support … the farming season is in a lull right now; sure I have work but it’s not critical and I can slow my pace (at least until Feb) … and maybe just maybe if I avoid further stress both physical and emotional, I might be able to stay ahead of the nasty beast Lupus

Thanks for listening! 

~~ KatherineT ~~ I'm a Harlequin Addict, and I'm proud of it!
~~ Quiet Canadians ~ 2008 Book Challenge Blog