Writer's Challenge 4

I know everyone wants to know what's coming next, so I post first and make comments later. ( I am posting this here again to make it easier to find for new people.)

      In 1000 words or less:

    (1)  Write a First Person POV story where the POV character (hero or heroine) is in an increasingly dangerous situation.  Please note: this story does not have to be Intrigue-like, the danger could be only perceived in the character’s mind and not be real.

The First Person POV  is ideal where there is imminent danger.  (For example, the heroine is a passenger in a light plane with her father piloting when he has a heart attack and she has to land the plane by herself. She has never flown a plane before. This would be very stressful to experience through the eyes of the heroine.)

   (2) The story should end with the physical appearance of the hero or heroine. (Depending on who the POV character is.)

(For example, the hero in the above story could be the one who talked her down to a safe landing.)

      (3)  Everything else is allowed. The story can be a paranormal, historical, inspirational, romantic comedy, you name it. The goal is to make the reader "feel" what the POV character is feeling.

       You can begin to post your entry at any time on Thursday the 10th of July.

       Posting ends at 12 midnight (your time) on Friday July 11th. 

        Results will be posted on Sunday July 13th.

Please. Please. I need two judges to volunteer. If you can do it, please email me at:  vmres@swbell.net.

I hope to see many entries. Let your creativity run wild.

Thanks,

Vince

Hi Anita Mae:

To answer your question:

"Vince - Did they both really die on the July 4th? Strange. I like the way the letters are addressed and they get more intimate as the wedding day approaches. Very nice."

     Yes, both John Adams and Thomas Jefferson died on the same day, July 4th 1826. John Adams was said to have said these last words before he died, "Jefferson survives"... however, Thomas Jefferson had already died a few hours before. So John Adams did survive.  There was also another President who also died on July 4th some years later.  (I'm only 99% sure who that was so I won't risk his name.)

            Loved your story. Can't wait to read your inspirational historical.

             Thanks,

                         Vince

Yes, James Monroe did die on July 4th of 31, but Adams and Jefferson both died the same day, July 4, 1826.

Congrats to the winners. I still haven't read all the enteries. Sorry

I was at a Folk music festival from Friday - Sunday. Only arriving home at 10 pm last night, tried to catch up on stories and posts only to lose my modem until mid-afternoon. We had to have it replaced.

Well, I almost never post first. It was almost as good as a cookie!

But the current challenge link is updated--I put it up as soon as I read them--and y'all have a new room, so things are lookin' good in here!

Hugs for your mom on the extra wait.

Dee 

This was one of the best festivals this organization has put on. They had a great mix of bands, solo artists, etc. My one daughter with special needs loves the jester who comes year after year. About 4 years ago he started giving out a skill to her to work on for the next year. What he is systematically doing is building the skills sets required to juggle. She is now up to the toss and cross over stage. So, there is something there she looks forward to year after year. My youngest daughter started out playing in a fiddle band for young kids 9 years ago, the past 2 years she has been transitioning over to a mentor. This year she led the more advanced kids in learning the tunes. Then on stage she started the kids off. She also participated in a 'Tree of Life' Concert -- this was started a few years ago for kids that were getting close to, or at mastery level of their talent. It is an opportunity to encourage young people to preserve traditional music.

For the most part the weather cooperated. Well until late Saturday afternoon, early evening. The evening concert had to be pulled indoors, but we weren't able to get everyone into the building. Fortunately, the rain stopped just before the concert. An exhausting, but awesome weekend.

BTW, sorry to hear about your mom's difficulties. How is she doing now?

Happy Canada Day to all

Just popping in to say that - just finished moving and the house looks like a refugee camp with all the boxes and crap stuff I possess *sigh*

where's a moving genie when you need one?

Vince - whoot! love the new challenge!

Lisa...if you scroll to the top of this page, Vince has posted the next challenge...just read it through, he's also posted the dates they need to be posted by....when you go to post.....just paste from your word doc and copy it here......as if you're posting a regular comment!

 good luck...it's an awesome bunch here....and a great learning experience!

Thank you for answering so quickly. I appreciate the help!

Lisa

I've been away from the computer, and probably won't be here tomorrow, due to a family get-together, so here it is! 

Welcome to all the new faces!

Nini, how's your mom?  We've had all of you in our thoughts & prayers. 

(And here I thought I was posting in the Struggling Writer's Club!)  I don't know if I'll have time for the challenge, but it does look like fun.  Does it need to be a whole short story?  Or just the introduction to one?

...can be the hardest thing to do!  I remember how hard it was when my mom was in the hospital.  She was in for four months, and pretty much nobody but Dad and the head surgeon and I thought she'd live.  I'm so thankful she's still here!  (((((Nini))))) (((((Jodie))))) (in case she sees this, too.)  (((((N & J's Mom)))))

Love your motto! 

Welcome Lisa - I really hope you join us for the challenge. Someone is always here to answer any questions you have - just ask away.

Also Lisa - if you go to your list on the top of the right column and click on Friends, then click Pending Requests, you'll find that I've requested to be your friend. You can ask others you see here to be your friends too. Sometimes it's easier to feel welcome when you're among friends.

Jodie and Nini - still keeping you all in my prayers.

Vince - Now that's a challenge! First person is NOT my favorite! Although I know Jodie for one won't have a problem with it.

from printing and getting wedding invites sent out. i'm late according to the wedding calendar: wedding date is 08-08-08 ( a friday)

it's craziness... i just want to show up, get my man, and go home.  i've never been a girly-girl, so all the trimmings are hard for me to plan. i could write about a fancy wedding with all the bells and whistles, just don't want to endure one.

if you'd like to see the picture for my wedding invite i'm using, i've posted it in my blog. (along with stray rants) http://community.eharlequin.com/content/wedding-plans-gone-amuck

back to addressing envelopes (yes, i'm printing labels, but the printer has a mind of its own right now *sigh*)

is not my style of writing...i've thrown out everything.  I can't do it.

Good luck to everyone else! I can't wait to read them.

Nini :)

Welcome!  We're happy to have you!

 Nini :)

Not wondering.  I'd like to say that was a typo but the truth is I just can't spell...Anyway, thanks for the welcomes.  Now, someone hurry and make me a friend, I don't want to be the only one without friends.  It's very sad-being friendless.

I tried to friend you. Sometimes it works, sometimes  not. (I think it's my browser.) But if you don't see my invite, click on me. I like having buddies. :)

Dee 

I started a scene today and got 1/3 of the way through, but I even bored myself! So, I guess I'm back to square one...

Peri and Lisa!!!!

Jodie... Gonna have to back out of the challenge this round. Finished bitiing my fingernails and have now started the actual finger while waiting for results on the noc bite pitch contest. Hurts to type. :)

How are you faring? Haven't read your submission to the contest, but have to confess you're part of the reason why I'm so nervous! lol! At this point I just want to KNOW - either way.

SueB

I don't do the noc stuff like you all do.  However....in deference to both Jodie and Sue...

You've two different story lines....very different...and both are really good!

Nini :)

Hi everyone! Been away from the computer for the holiday. Hope everyone enjoyed theirs. Trying to catch up a bit.

Don't know if I'll enter this challenge. I'm steadily trying but having writing issues. Don't know how I feel about 1st person either. I'll let y'all know for sure later this week. But good luck to everyone trying...or not.

Welcome all newbies! Can't wait to have you participate. The first one is the hardest to share. But it gets a little easier when you realize no one virtual laughs at you!

Deb--08-08 is such a great day!!!! That happens to be my anniversary. When you're busy saying I-Dos, I'll be celebrating my 16th! I know what you mean about the planning. I could've easily eloped, but our families would've killed us. But I'm glad to have had the experience (although I'd never do it again). Good Luck to you and your man. I'm sure it'll be great!

Nini & Jodie--I know the waiting is the hardest part. Hope you hear good news soon. Y'all are still in my thoughts and prayers.

TTYL

Ann Leslie is sick, so things are postponed....

I finished it this past weekend. I've made a few small changes (courtesy of Nini -- I ignored some advice, but took other parts of it ) and I'll go through it again now that we have a bit longer to review it, but overall, I'm done. Just under 15K.

I can't imagine trying to do two!! Good for you!

The Colony. 991words

‘To the right.’ Ren’s voice echoed through my helmet.

I turned to see a large darkened tunnel,
the visual readout screen showed three blips.

‘Throw the bomb, let’s get on with this.’ I
was not in the mood to pussy foot around these stinking tunnels anymore.

Gil threw the small round ultraviolet
device down the tunnel. ‘Two, one, go.’

I squinted my eyes even though the helmet
reflected most of the radiation, it was an old knee jerk reaction.

A high pitched squeal went out into the suffocating
dark. Three down.

The neck of my skin suit was chaffing
again, the tiny particles of recycled rubber and Kevlar just didn’t sit right. But
today that was the last of my worries.

That such things could exist on this world
annoyed me. We were sent as the forward
scouts to cleanse the planet and ready it for colonisation, how in the seven
systems could we have not come across these before? It didn’t make sense. The planet was clean,
ready for the terraformers to go and then people went missing. At first it was one or two, but when an
entire outcrop of staff disappear without even a whisper something’s wrong.

Now here we were, six warriors, outfitted
in the latest technological wizardry, getting ready to annihilate an entire species just so the Colony could live. But in this day and age it was survival
of the colony first, consequences later.

‘Ren, take Summer and follow this tunnel
due east, keep the ultraviolet lamps lit, keep your sunbombs ready.’

I knew Ren would get the job done, he was a
veteran of six major campaigns, Summer on the other hand was our token rookie. We had to have one, every unit
does, but it bugged me that the powers that be would send one into this type of warzone. They had no clue.

My visor readout showed the layout of the
tunnel system, we could see there were two chambers ahead, one full of what looked like tiny green blips, that would be the smaller breeds, and the
main chamber was lit up like an ancient Christmas tree.

‘Laney, we need to speed things up, it’s
getting later in the day up here.’ Grahams peevishness was audible.

‘We’re almost there.’ I couldn’t help it if
he wasn’t suited for this type of mission, no one faulted him, but as the units leader he expected to be in charge of the follow up.

‘Move it.’ Came the reply.

I signalled to Gil, Banner, and Muck that
we would take it on the run.

Each pulled out two sunbombs a piece jogging
after me. The problem with Wraiths was
you just never knew where they’d turn up.

The first chamber looked like a scene from
an old horror movie, large vaulted ceilings, covered in a type of glitter that would have looked pretty had I not known the source. Gil threw out two of his bombs, we made it to
the end of the chamber before they went off.
The screaming surrounded us. Unfortunately we’d
missed one in the antechamber. Muck found that out the hard way. One minute
he was there, the next there was nothing but dust and the clatter of metal on the stone floor.

He’d already set his bombs to go off, when
they hit the floor I knew we had three seconds to get out of their direct blast before we would be hit with a lethal dose of gamma radiation.

‘Run.’ I shouted into the commlink. Banner and Gil were already ahead of me on
that score.

The small tunnel leading to the main
chamber took most of the blast.
Unfortunately for us it woke the occupants a tad earlier than we’d
hoped.

‘We’re dead.’ It was such a simple
statement from Banner, but it carried all the dread that had risen in my own stomach. Grey wisps of smoke started pouring down the walls coming directly
towards us.

Wraiths.

‘Then let’s take everyone with us.’ My
reply was pure bravado, but it worked to rally the group into finishing our task.

We threw the bombs as far as we could into
the huge cavern, turning to run back the way we had come. Gil and Banner never made it, I was thrown to
the ground as six sunbombs exploded at once, they had let me go first, stupid chivalry was still alive and well in the forces. It cost them their lives.

The room darkened around me as I lost
consciousness.

‘Who is she?’ The mellow voice whispered.

‘She’s a killer, we must dispense with her.’
Another replied.

‘Yes, but did you see what she did to those
around us? Fascinating, I think I’ll
keep her as a pet.’ The authority in the voice brokered no argument.

‘She just killed seven thousand, in one
go. She must be punished.’ Another susurration
followed the statement.

‘No, she’s mine to do with as I decide.’

‘She wakes.’

‘I know.
You can stop pretending now. Get on your,’ there was a short pause, ‘feet.’

I was surrounded by glowing ethereal bodies. Their beauty was stunning, but I knew that at
any second my life would be forfeit.

They were the enemy.

‘Tell me, why you did this?’

A large male Wraith was standing to my
left. His form was comely, but
deadly. One touch was all it took.

‘You have killed our people.’

‘We did not, your people joined us
willingly, and now you come along to kill thousands of us, some of whom were
your own.’ He moved slowly around me, as if inspecting a prize possession. ‘Perhaps
you would like to know what that feels like?’

Smiling slowly I looked the creature in the
face. ‘No, but what if I made you disappear too.’ The loaded sunbomb sat on the palm of my hand.

The Wraith started laughing. ‘You certainly don’t give up.’

‘Never.’

……………………

Saturday’s were my favorite days.  Sleeping in, followed by a long run and a hot shower before having breakfast with my favorite man and best friend, Andy.  Today was no different.  On my way down the stairs of my apartment building, I had waved to Ms. Winter as she pulled her little terrier short on his leash so he couldn’t nip at my ankle.  He and I knew the game, but Ms. Winter really didn’t know she had a tiger living on her roof.

Now, sweaty and panting from the heat, I trotted back up the stairs.  I was halfway up the last flight when the scent washed over me.  Stumbling to a halt, I breathed it in even though my enhanced senses didn’t need any clarification.  Blood.  So sweet and fresh that the deep breath caused the metallic taste of it to coat my tongue.

There was only one apartment above Ms. Winter’s landing.  Mine.  It had been empty when I’d locked it on my way out.  Obviously, it wasn’t now.  With shaking hands, I picked up my phone and hit the speed dial.

“Yo ho, Tigger.  I’m not late and unless you skipped your run, you’re not ready.  Please don’t tell me I’ve driven in from the boonies just so you can cancel on me.”

Andy’s accent was thick as honey, but his tone held cheer like always.  When Andy lost his cheerful good fellow tone, things were bad.  I wondered if I was about to see how fast that could happen.

“Andy…”  I hesitated and had to clear my throat.  God, the rich smell of blood was almost too much.  “Andy, there’s blood in my apartment.”

“Where are you, Tig?”  Just like that, my laughing friend was gone and the investigator was in his place.

“Halfway up the landing.  I stopped as soon as I smelled…”

“Okay, stay put.  I’m going to put you on hold and call Beau to call the police.  I won’t be but a second.”

Leaning against the wall, I braced myself against the temptation.  Slowly, I began mentally counting the seconds.  It was less than a minute, but felt like an eternity when Andy’s voice came back on the line.

“I’m turning into your complex right now.  The guard waved me right through.  Stay put and I’ll be right there.  Whatever you do, don’t go in that room without the authorities.”

“And why would I go in that room?  Hello, I wasn’t born yesterday….”

Then it hit me.  Trouble.  Trouble was my cat.  I know, it seemed ironic to have a cat when I was one, but I had found her curled up on my rooftop patio when I’d moved in.  She was too cold, hungry, and desperate to have any self-preservation left so had moved right on in.

I had gone up two more steps before I’d consciously taken a step.

“Tig, I mean it.”

Andy’s tone hardened and the good fellow mask he wore faded away.

“Trouble’s in there, Andy.  I can’t…I’ve got to make sure she’s okay.”

“Tig, I’m parking outside.  Give me three minutes and I’ll be right there.   I’m…”

I flipped the phone shut and slipped it back onto the plastic holster clipped to the belly band holding my keys.  I had the keys into the lock without realizing I’d reached the landing.  The scent of blood was breaking my concentration and giving the tiger more power than she usually had.  Pushing the door open, I heard the doors crash open three floors below.

“Tig!”

Ignoring the thundering of Andy’s feet on the stairs, I stepped into chaos.  My foyer was exactly as I’d left it except there was a pair of keys in the crystal bowl that hadn’t been there before.  Add that to the large pair of men’s dress shoes sitting politely by the shoe rack under the foyer table and I knew whoever had done this wasn’t an amateur.  Someone had gone though a lot of trouble to make it look like I’d lost control of my beast and done the unthinkable.

“Trouble?”

For the first time in three years, the little gray tabby didn’t rush to meet me at the door.  While I prayed she was hiding under the bed or above the refrigerator, the apartment was too still for it to be true.  The first tear slid down my cheek as a panting Andy practically fell on the landing.  Turning to face him, I was careful not to touch anything that might hold a fingerprint.

“Did you touch anything?”

He was panting from running up the stairs and his dark hair looked like he’d found a tornado on the way.  His tone was hard and demanding as his gaze swept the foyer and great room beyond.

Mutely, I shook my head and tried not to breathe in the smell of carnage.  Andy’s grey eyes were flinty as his gaze latched onto the keys and froze.

“Did you have a visitor?”

“You know I don’t bring humans home, Andy.”

A ghost of a smile tipped his lips as he slid his arm around me urging me back out onto the landing as the first strains of a police siren reached my ears.

“Yeah, right.  You’re just trying to make me feel better because it isn’t me lying in there all mauled and happy.”

It was such an outrageous comment that I had to stare at him a moment before realizing he was trying to make me feel better.  Trust Andy to find a way to make a joke before they hauled me off in a collar and leg irons.

Instead of laughter, I choked back a sob and closed the distance between us.  Without having to say anything, his arms wrapped around me and he pulled me close.  I barely felt his kiss on my temple as he promised it would all go away.

I’d never wanted to believe anything so much.  I also knew a lie when I heard one.